Don’t Lose Your Cool!

We have all been in the moment when we are about to lose our cool!  Your emotions and your reactions just take over and then…you immediately regret it.

It’s like the sane part of your brain just stopped working and the things you were saying completely stunned and shocked you and everyone else around you.

Well, that really isn’t you, you just weren’t thinking straight, sometimes feelings and opinions can have a way of taking over.

So whether you are frustrated, or worried or stressed to your limit, there are grounding exercises that you can use as a tool to put aside any distractions and allow you to be present in the moment.

  • Pick a spot to sit that will be comfortable and allows you to stay alert.
  • Close your eyes, and bring your attention to your breath, in and out.  Focus on the feeling of air going in and out of your nose.
  • Feel the pressure of your feet on the ground, or yourself sitting on the chair.   Feel the solid connection and stability where you are in contact with the floor or chair.
  • Spread your awareness to your body and feel what other sensations that you experience.
  • Bring your attention to your mouth.  Can you taste anything?
  • Bring your attention to your nose.  Can you smell anything?
  • Bring your attention to your ears.  What can you hear in the room?  Can you hear anything outside of the room?
  • Look around the room.  What do you notice?  Find one thing you haven’t noticed before.
  • Acknowledge other people in the room as you catch their eye.  Smile or nod to acknowledge them.

Strong emotions push experiences deeper into our brains rather than when we just receive simple, clear-cut information.  Approaching a difficult conversation with this mindset increases the chances that everyone come out stronger in the end.

Keep in mind that you’re probably not the only one who’s upset.  Your colleague is likely to have some anger or frustration too and difficult conversations can throw the best of us off balance when they are arise unexpectedly.

These grounding exercises can play an important role with conflict resolution.  They can help prepare you for difficult conversations and even help get an office meeting off to a great start.

What strategies do you use to stay grounded during difficult conversations?



Dave Baney is the founder and CEO of 55 Questions, LLC and author of The 3×5 Coach: A Practical Guide to Coaching Your Team for Greater Results and Happier People“, which is now available in Paperback or a Kindle version at




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